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"Yes Mammy."

"Well, you know what I was thinking?"

"No Mammy, what's that?"

"Well I was thinking, you know, how nice it was having your friend Michael over for Christmas dinner."

"Yes Mammy."

"Well you know, he's a lovely lad and we think the world of him."

"Right Mammy."

"Well, I was just thinking, well your Dad and I, we were just thinking, that well, you know next year I'm going to be sixty, right?"

"That's right Mammy, sure you're getting younger every year."

"Ah, now stop that Tommy, no no, what I am trying to say is, well isn't it time?"

"Time for what Mammy? A cup of tea?"

"No Tommy, I mean yes, of course, Tommy, but no not really I suppose."

"What then, Mammy?"

"Well, isn't it time that you made a decent fella out of Michael?"


"Isn't it time the two of you got married? You know, like next year for my sixtieth birthday, it'd be the best present ever."

"Ah sweet jaysus Mammy, they only just passed the vote, I'm way too young to be getting married."

"Don't you "sweet jaysus" your mother son, none of that talk in this house. Your mother's right. Michael is not going to stick around waiting for you to stop playing video games. He'll be gone off with some other fella and then what will you do?"

"Ah no, Dad, no Michael's not going anywhere."

"Now you listen to me son, after I was out with your mother four times I knew we were going to get married so I proposed to her. When are you going to propose to Michael?"

"Ah Dad, come on dad, don't be siding with Mam on this, there's no rush."

"Your 28 son, 28. Michael has another gray hair, I saw it yesterday, his clock is ticking, he won't wait forever."

"Ah Dad, would you stop it. Mary needs to be getting married not me."

"Mary is too busy with her career, she doesn't even have a fella. And we want a grandson too."

"Whaaaaat? A baby? You want me to have a baby?"

"Of course! We want a grandchild, we're not getting younger, are we?. You're great at being an uncle, but it's time you grew up and had your own. There's lots of little babies who have no home, and you two would be a great two daddies."

"Ah Dad, me and Michael married with kids, I don't know about that."

"Look it, Tessie Mangan was already down at the hairdressers today going on about her Johnny getting married now that the referendum is done, you think we want a bachelor queen living in our house when we are eighty? Do you? Now, get out there and buy a ring, it's time for you to settle down."

"Ah Mammy, ah Daddy."

"Son, listen to your Mam, she's right, just like she was about you when you were eight."

"Ah Dad, stop that."

"Promise us you'll think about it Tommy, won't you now son, you'd be making us so happy, the two you walking down the aisle or whatever it is they have for that now."

"Ok, Mammy, ok Daddy. Now, I'm going for a pint."

"Ah me too, I'd love a pint, and you too Mammy, a little brandy maybe?"

"Sure, why not, we'll all go and have a little celebration for the referendum and the chance for our boy to do the right thing."

"Yes, Mammy. Yes, Daddy."

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