My Big, Fat, Rock 'n' Roll Wedding by Kate Moss
(As imagined by Kim Wilson)
"I will get up, as soon as I've finished this last cigarette. Charlotte (Tilbury, on make-up) won't be here for another twenty minutes; you haven't seen my eyeliner have you? And James (Brown, on hair) is having breakfast in the kitchen.
Has my dress arrived yet? Alice (Temperley, on fashion advice) says is makes me look romantic, in a vintage yet bohemian way. Isn't that nice, a little note from Galliano from the gaol: 'Sorry to be missing what is set to be the bash of the century. X'
You couldn't make me a vodka tonic could you Meg (Matthews, fellow chic rocker)? Sadie's gone to the shops with Kayne to get some more of those crystal ashtrays. They are fantastic. I wonder if they sell any ponchos. It got terribly cold last week at Glasto.
Where's my ring? Where Is My Ring? WHERE ISSS MYYY RRRING?
Oh, thanks Stella (McCartney, long term, trusted friend). Don't know what I'd do without you. It's a shame your dad's band couldn't play at 'Mossstock' but Jamie was dead set on having The Rolling Stones.
Ready! Let's go. The sooner we get there, the sooner we can get back and open the prezzies. Phillip (Green, of Topshop fame) has promised me an unlimited store card.
I might give Jamie a baby!"